The word " Cancer" is still a taboo to many, even among the most educated too. It is considered to be a cursed disease, even with today's latest medical technology. The first reaction to it is "Oh No, Cancer?"
Cancer is not the end of the world. Yes it does involve a lot of mental turmoil. When you decide not to give in to the disease half your battle is won. It is only a positive attitude towards the whole treatment, that can help anyone. The battle starts, from the time you feel a lump, but until the pathology report and the doctor's verdict comes, we need to think positive. Otherwise stress makes the person so weak and open to all type of emotional despair.I know it is easier said, than done. But having gone through everything myself, I am able to come to this conclusion.
Once you are told that the lump is malignant, it is better to educate yourself about the treatment, its after effects and outcomes. The best person for this, is the doctor. The doctor always tells you about the do's and dont's of the treatment. Then mentally prepare yourself for the ordeal. I use the word ordeal, because it is not easy to sail through it for anyone, even the person with the strongest will. It needs a lot of will power to decide, " Yes, I am going to fight it out, and not going to give up my fight, what ever happens."
The chemotherapy is very traumatic. But not unbearable. You have to put your mind at ease first to go through the trauma. I found my solace in music, there is nothing music cannot do. Music can heal anything. The after effect of chemotherapy is not the same in every individual. It differs from person to person. Some may not feel anything. But most of them get ulcers in the mouth, mood swings, levels of electrolytes varying, nausea and sometimes diarrhea. There will be no taste in the mouth whatsoever. If you just think about it and lament, then there is no end to it. As soon as you can lift your head, it is better to keep yourself occupied in doing something that you love to do. I too did feel, many a time, that my control was slipping. But I was determined. Being given strong Chemotherapy, I was ready to face anything. Another trauma of Chemotherapy is loss of hair. It just comes out in your hand after two weeks of the first chemotherapy. So, it is always better to shave your head and be happy. I did just that. My friends used to tease me saying, I have a serene look, one saffron saree would have added to it. Apart from the pain of the surgeries, these psychological factors are more painful. Only with a determination and strong will you can go through it.
In my two years with cancer, I have undergone three surgeries, needle biopsies and various scans. I have considered each experience as one from which I learnt something new. Never have I cursed God or asked "Why me?" Some say you suffer like this because of your karma. I don't know what it is. But I have only prayed for strength. I have been living with the pain from that time. Now if There is a day, that I get up without pain, I feel that there is something wrong with me. Doctor told me I have to live with the pain. All don't get pain. May be it depends on the type of cancer too. I have accepted the fact that I have to live with it. So it is part and parcel of my daily life.
Here I would like to thank all my doctors, who stood by me. My family Doctor, Dr. Suchetha Banerjee who has been treating my family for the last 26 years. She knew me very well. She was a friend, counselor and guide for me. My surgeon & cardiologist, Dr. Siva Kumar & Dr. Ayyappan, who always explained everything to me. Cardiologist would always give me a pat and tell me, So you have withstood this surgery too. My oncologist Dr. Sivakumar, was an ever smiling man, who always greeted us with a broad smile. An ever patient man, who explained everything and cleared all doubts. His wife always had a kind word for all the patients. A mathematician, but gave up that profession to be with the patients, inquiring about each one's family and health. An ever smiling lady with a lot of positive flow on her. She always used to tell me," Ma'am, you always have a positive glow on your face, that radiates." She herself was a motivator.
The whole process is fascinating now because I feel like a different person. I must have become less feminine, but I consider myself beautiful still. Having cancer and facing death changed me. Better yet, I chose to change. I refused to allow this traumatic experience to break me. Instead, it infused me with a new drive to live, and do everything that I love doing and that which gives me immense joy. It awakened in me the infinite possibilities contained in living life fully, the best life possible. It brought in me the urge to inspire others.
Cancer is not the end of the world. Yes it does involve a lot of mental turmoil. When you decide not to give in to the disease half your battle is won. It is only a positive attitude towards the whole treatment, that can help anyone. The battle starts, from the time you feel a lump, but until the pathology report and the doctor's verdict comes, we need to think positive. Otherwise stress makes the person so weak and open to all type of emotional despair.I know it is easier said, than done. But having gone through everything myself, I am able to come to this conclusion.
Once you are told that the lump is malignant, it is better to educate yourself about the treatment, its after effects and outcomes. The best person for this, is the doctor. The doctor always tells you about the do's and dont's of the treatment. Then mentally prepare yourself for the ordeal. I use the word ordeal, because it is not easy to sail through it for anyone, even the person with the strongest will. It needs a lot of will power to decide, " Yes, I am going to fight it out, and not going to give up my fight, what ever happens."
The chemotherapy is very traumatic. But not unbearable. You have to put your mind at ease first to go through the trauma. I found my solace in music, there is nothing music cannot do. Music can heal anything. The after effect of chemotherapy is not the same in every individual. It differs from person to person. Some may not feel anything. But most of them get ulcers in the mouth, mood swings, levels of electrolytes varying, nausea and sometimes diarrhea. There will be no taste in the mouth whatsoever. If you just think about it and lament, then there is no end to it. As soon as you can lift your head, it is better to keep yourself occupied in doing something that you love to do. I too did feel, many a time, that my control was slipping. But I was determined. Being given strong Chemotherapy, I was ready to face anything. Another trauma of Chemotherapy is loss of hair. It just comes out in your hand after two weeks of the first chemotherapy. So, it is always better to shave your head and be happy. I did just that. My friends used to tease me saying, I have a serene look, one saffron saree would have added to it. Apart from the pain of the surgeries, these psychological factors are more painful. Only with a determination and strong will you can go through it.
In my two years with cancer, I have undergone three surgeries, needle biopsies and various scans. I have considered each experience as one from which I learnt something new. Never have I cursed God or asked "Why me?" Some say you suffer like this because of your karma. I don't know what it is. But I have only prayed for strength. I have been living with the pain from that time. Now if There is a day, that I get up without pain, I feel that there is something wrong with me. Doctor told me I have to live with the pain. All don't get pain. May be it depends on the type of cancer too. I have accepted the fact that I have to live with it. So it is part and parcel of my daily life.
Here I would like to thank all my doctors, who stood by me. My family Doctor, Dr. Suchetha Banerjee who has been treating my family for the last 26 years. She knew me very well. She was a friend, counselor and guide for me. My surgeon & cardiologist, Dr. Siva Kumar & Dr. Ayyappan, who always explained everything to me. Cardiologist would always give me a pat and tell me, So you have withstood this surgery too. My oncologist Dr. Sivakumar, was an ever smiling man, who always greeted us with a broad smile. An ever patient man, who explained everything and cleared all doubts. His wife always had a kind word for all the patients. A mathematician, but gave up that profession to be with the patients, inquiring about each one's family and health. An ever smiling lady with a lot of positive flow on her. She always used to tell me," Ma'am, you always have a positive glow on your face, that radiates." She herself was a motivator.
The whole process is fascinating now because I feel like a different person. I must have become less feminine, but I consider myself beautiful still. Having cancer and facing death changed me. Better yet, I chose to change. I refused to allow this traumatic experience to break me. Instead, it infused me with a new drive to live, and do everything that I love doing and that which gives me immense joy. It awakened in me the infinite possibilities contained in living life fully, the best life possible. It brought in me the urge to inspire others.
No comments:
Post a Comment